What are top tricks of psychology that everyone should follow to make life easier and keep ahead … by @daniel_ndukwu
Answer by Daniel Ndukwu:
1. Ladies: wear red
For women the color red makes them exponentially more attractive. Research has shown that men will go to great lengths to do things for a woman in red that they would not do otherwise like give her money or even carry her across the street.
2. Go to you managers with solutions instead of problems
Everyone brings problems but very few people bring solutions. If you're the one bringing solutions you will be noticed and rewarded for it
3. Try shutting up.
If someone gives you a lousy answer to a question, stay quiet and keep eye contact and they’ll usually feel pressured to keep talking and reveal more. I don't know why it works, but it always does, especially in high stakes situations like negotiations
4. Trick them into liking you
The Ben Franklin effect is a proposed psychological phenomenon: A person who has performed a favor for someone is more likely to do another favor for that person than they would be if they had received a favor from that person. An explanation for this would be that we internalize the reason that we helped them was because we liked them. The opposite case is also believed to be true, namely that we come to hate a person whom we did wrong to. We de-humanize them to justify the bad things we did to them
5. Say their Name a lot
The most charming people have the strange habit of using your name a lot. When you meet someone, help yourself remember their name by saying it a lot in conversation which has the added effect of making them like you.
6. Learn by teaching.
studies show you retain a lot more information and overall comprehension improves when you teach something you know to someone else.
7. Excitement is contagious
If you're nervous about something, cover it up with excitement and the people around you will key in and reflect that excitement. Pretty soon you won't be nervous anymore because of all the good vibes
8. Touch them a little
Touch is a powerful tool. Waiters who learn the art of unobtrusive touching are tipped more. When talking to someone lightly touch them on the arm, thigh, or knee to emphasize your points and to make them comfortable around you.
9. Be an Active listener
Ask clarifying questions, maintain eye contact, and make remarks like uh huh and really.
10. Learn the pause
The optimal rate of speech is 3.5 words per second and you should pause 4-5 times a minute.
11. Make them think you compromised
If you want $10 start out by asking for $50. When the person refuses, ask them for the $10 instead to "help you along" they fell bad for refusing you and will jump on the opportunity to give you 10 buck.
12. Start small
This is the opposite of number 11. Instead of starting with something they'll likely refuse, start with something they can't say no to. After they agree, make a second request a day or two later that's just slightly larger. This works because of congruence, we like to stay in line with what we've done in the past. ( next time you're reading a long form sales page online, try and look for the places they make you agree to something that's a no brainer)
13. Wait until they're tired
When we're tired, our mental energy drops. We're less able to perform higher cognitive activities like weighing pros and cons in a decision. If you want to get someone to agree to something they'd normally refuse, wait until they're tired before dropping the bomb.
14. Don't tell them they're wrong
Instead acknowledge their stance, state where you have common ground, and articulate your own points. This will make them much more likely to listen to you.
15. Just nod
Nodding is a universal sign of agreement right. When you nod in front of someone they'll start to nod as well. This turns them to an agreement state of mind and sets the groundwork to allow you to ask for favors.
16. Mirror mirror on the wall
If you find yourself working with angry people a lot, put a mirror behind you. It'll force people to look at their faces and relax.
17. Focus on the process
The mind is a wonderful thing, instead of focusing on the end goal, focus on the steps you'll need to take to reach it. Your mind will come up with amazing ideas to help you reach them.
18. Use silence to deal with anger
When someone shouts or otherwise loses their temper, don't react the same way. Instead, look at them with a blank stare and keep quiet. 99% of the time they'll calm down
19. Use emotions
People don't remember you, they remember how you make them feel. When talking infuse your words with sincere emotions and people will pick up on it and like you more.
20. Frame your request as an offer
Teddy Roosevelt was running for president, his campaign printed out 3 million leaflets with a picture of Teddy and a copy of a campaign speech. The campaign then realized that they didn't have the rights to the photo. Instead of explaining the situation to the photographer, which would have given him leverage to ask for a lot of money, the campaign made an offer that they would use the picture, giving the photographer lots of publicity if the studio paid them $250. The studio paid the money.
21. Drinking games
If you're playing beer pong and your opponent is playing like he sold his soul to the Devil, all you have to do is ask what he is doing to with his opposite throwing hand.
"Damn bro you're playing hella good! What are you doing with your left hand when you shoot?"
This will make him conscious of his left hand and he will start messing up almost everytime!
22. Stay silent during shit talking.
When people are gossiping, don't participate. Over time, they'll stop gossiping around you completely. They'll also begin to trust you more and tell you their deep secrets because they know you won't tell anyone.
As an added bonus, you'll fill the time reserved for shit talking with more intimate and meaningful conversations.
23. Be an honest liar
Tell the truth most of the time so when you lie it'll be taken at face value
Me, I'm dishonest. And a dishonest man, you can always trust to be dihonest. Honestly: it's the honest ones you want to watch out for. You never know when they're going to do something completely stupid." – Jack Sparrow, The Pirates of the Caribbean
24. Who's having sex with who?
When laughter breaks out in a group of people, each one will instinctively glance at whichever other individual they feel closest to in that group. People who've been naked together seem to feel pretty close
25. Argument first, stance second
Tell people what you believe first rather than why you believe it. For example if you say I'm an atheist and this is what I believe, people will discount you because they already know the motivations of your actions.
26. Be first or last
People always have the clearest memory of first and last thing that happens, while the middle becomes a vague blur. So if you’re setting the time for an interview, try and be the first or last through the door.
27. Threats into challenges
The same reaction your body has to fear is the exact same reaction you have when exhibiting courage. Reframe threats into challenges